There's no twist to this fairy tale.
Sometimes I feel like we live in the slums of Connecticut College. We “villagers”—residents of the Ridge, Abbey House and Winchester—are an isolated bunch, due mostly to our location across Route 32. Many of us willingly chose this private existence, to get away from the tumult of life on campus. We were sick of the green fields, the convenience, the way everybody would smile and say “hi” to each other while walking to the library. We were also fed up with the number of coffee shops (we’ve heard three more have opened since the start of the year).
Life in the village (Abbey House, for me) is a constant struggle, though. I dodge cars like a human Frogger to get to class every day, lest I should wait for ten minutes to get the privilege of crossing when the glowing orange hand tells me to. Our dorm is infested with the cutest field mice you ever laid eyes on. Also, people consistently come through and rob us of our food, food we need to eat in order to survive, on a daily basis. Campus safety patrols us constantly, lurking in the shadows to hear the sound of a Busch Light can being smashed against somebody’s forehead in order to pounce and write up as many students as possible. The foundations of all the village buildings are crumbling and decrepit— I have been to Winchesters that are covered in mold, and it’s generally known that Ridge apartments are inherently grimy. We at Abbey House roll around in our own filth—we don’t even have an ashtray or a compost bin, though it is common knowledge that everybody who lives in Abbey House is a chain-smoking hippy and a communist.
Why is alternative housing so neglected and even frowned upon on this campus? Since we want to cook our own food and not eat Harris beef au jus every night or be part of a community that isn’t a dorm or a hospital, it’s as if Conn says, “You’re on your own, guys.” Seriously, we at Abbey had a generator for the first week of school, one that provided the dorm with two-thirds power, as if that’s ever an acceptable amount of power when the rest of the school is lit up like a Christmas tree (I know 360 and Earth were powerless, too. Sorry bros). Campus Safety has walked into some Ridge apartments without a call or complaint to justify their entrance; it’s like the wild west. Not to mention, it is the biggest hassle in the world to try and obtain specialty housing like River Ridge, Winchesters, 360 and Earth House. Interviews, paperwork and God forbid if you didn’t sign up for the housing lottery. And God forbid if you want to live off-campus. There’s an obvious demand for alternative housing options (I’m going to go out on a limb and say that R.E.A.L. received a record amount of applications this year), so why is the Village so ignored and distrusted?
I look at my poor side of campus and long for a change, because I love it so much. Maybe the school will pave the road from Ridge to Abbey instead of keeping it in worse condition than a section of the Oregon Trail and then letting the cold dirt freeze over in the winter making it absolutely impossible to drive on. Maybe they’ll fix up some of the basic structural foundations of these buildings and make sure the rooms have basic things such as closet doors and dressers. Maybe they won’t treat us like a bunch of party animals (I stress the word animals here). Or perhaps they will continue to let us rot in our freedom, scorning us for our liberty until we come crawling back like a starving Putto to live in Hamilton and get on a full meal plan. I can’t really say at this point.
For a school that prides itself on preparing its students for the real world, alternative living should be more prevalent and more encouraged. We will not always have nice people cooking up vats of oatmeal and serving up Egg McConn’s for us in the morning before we undertake our daily tasks. Most of us will not have keycard protected buildings that block out intruders on a serene campus. To Conn I say: Show us that you care about our well being after we’re finished emptying our pockets for you and give equal treatment to all houses and dorms, not just those that are shown on tours. Fix up Abbey and get us a dish washer. Fix up the Ridge Apartments, and allow more than ten people to congregate there legally. Fix up the Winchesters and let a beautiful community continue to flourish down there. Do it for the future. •
Wow, Ethan. You’ve taken on about ten separate complaints, they’re all different, none are spelled out or defended, and in the end you only come out sounding whiny and entitled: I live across a busy street (a choice); there are mice in my house; people eat my food; campus safety is mean to me; Conn students stereotype us, and it’s mean; our buildings are “crumbling and decrepit” (dare I say a gross exaggeration); we only had two thirds power after a hurricane; REAL is mean; Conn won’t let whoever live off campus that wants to; we don’t have a dishwasher; the rule about the amount of people able to congregate in a Ridge apartment should be totally abolished.
That last one is not an afterthought.
I just don’t buy it: if you’re choosing not to pay for a meal plan, why aren’t you responsible for the cleanliness of your kitchen? You are when you have your own home. And if Conn has a certain budget, why wouldn’t they fix a road 2000 cars use a day instead of one 30 do? You can’t just complain – it makes for a weak argument. Focus, research, and back it up.
Also, that photo is totally useless and irrelevant. If you’re going to complain that Abbey’s a mess (if that’s your point, after all), that was a missed opportunity to show us.
I’m pretty sure it was a satirical article…
Hi Unimpressed,
If the picture of M. Night Shyamalan didn’t clue you into the tone of the article, it was one of facetiousness (he made a movie called “The Village.” Get it?) It’s a laundry list of complaints that need no further “focus” or “research.” I appreciate that you read my article with enough care to dissect its essence and I am sorry you were unimpressed by it. However, this article was obviously not meant for somebody like you. It’s a known fact on this campus that the Village is slightly less kempt than the rest of the buildings at Conn, but hey, that’s what we dig about it. This article was merely an attempt to jokingly poke fun of the Village while highlighting some important complaints and sentiments that many students share.
So before you bash somebody, make sure you understand the content yourself, because what you did was the equivalent of earnestly reacting to an article published in The Onion.