Courtesy of SpaceX
Between the time you swiped your Camel Card into Harris and actually managed to find a seat amidst the lunch rush and few seating options, Katy Perry went to space.
Perry traveled to the Kármán line, the globally agreed-upon boundary between Earth’s atmosphere and outer space, alongside celebrities Lauren Sánchez, Amanda Nguyen, Gayle King, Kerianne Flynn, and Aisha Bowe.
By going to space, I mean these rich influencers and faux activists went on a glorified Disney ride. The New Shepard rocket was in outer space for about 10 minutes and 21 seconds. You know something is up when it is quicker to travel to space than it is to walk down to Conn’s athletic center.
Blue Origin is the privately owned space technology company running this show. The company is owned and operated by none other than Jeff Bezos. Hear me out, everyone. If the company is run by a billionaire with lots of social, economic, and political capital, it can’t be that bad, right? Right, guys?
The ladies’ lavish trip in a completely autonomous rocket has been the subject of criticism and scrutiny, to which I am happy to add. Many have pointed out the frivolity of this trip, especially in a time when people worldwide experience catastrophic hardship and loss. Others are focused on the heinous environmental impacts of “space tourism,” a burgeoning market for people with literally nothing better to do.
Us earthlings see this trip for what it really is: a massive PR stunt poorly masquerading itself as the next wave of feminism. Blue Origin marketed this journey as a bold endorsement for young girls to pursue STEM (science, technology, engineering, and math). Perhaps instead of cosplaying as feminist warriors, the money for this mission could have been allocated towards STEM organizations or school programs that support girls in science. In 2021, only 18% of women were working in a STEM field. There’s plenty that can be done to increase those numbers while keeping our feet firmly planted on the ground.
It seems that these space travelers were also unclear on the true purpose of this trip. For example, I give you Katy Perry waxing poetic after she stepped off the ship and kissed the dirt. With tears in her eyes, she delivered a verse to rival California Gurls and Teenage Dream: “I feel super connected to love. So connected to love. I think this experience has shown me you never know how much love is inside of you, like, how much love you have to give, and how loved you are until the day you launch.” Most people can feel love and recognize the beauty and fragility of our Earth while actually staying on the planet. Her words just go to show how out of touch this mission truly was.
You may be wondering what this journey cost (other than my sanity and nitrous oxide sent into our atmosphere). While Blue Origin has not released the trip’s total cost, the down payment is a cool $150,000. Who knew feminism had an entry fee?
Piling rich and famous women with the means to experience space tourism into a shuttle for 10 minutes is incomparable to the valiant work of female astronauts breaking actual barriers for decades. Let’s talk about Valentina Tereshkova, who became the first woman in space, orbiting the Earth 48 times on a solo mission. How about Suni Williams, one of two astronauts who were stranded in the International Space Station for nearly nine months, returning a few weeks ago. She has set an incredible example for young women, logging three trips to space in her career. Apparently, all that space stuff wasn’t challenging enough, so she went and became the first person to run a marathon in space.
The list of women contributing to science and engineering in meaningful ways is extensive. That’s what makes the Blue Origin flight so artificial, so laughable. At least recognize that this trip was for fun (or if you’re Katy Perry, to promote the setlist for your tour), and not contributing to science, equality, or advancement for humanity.
What really gets me is the hypocrisy on display. Lauren Sánchez (Bezos’ fiancée) said that when she was in space (for ten minutes), she realized that “we’re all in this together.” It definitely felt like we were all in this together when Sánchez was in the second row at Trump’s inauguration, cheering on a man who degrades women and delights in eliminating any forms of diversity and inclusion from our society, things that have actual ability to empower the next generation of female astronauts, astrophysicists and the like. Sánchez is taking up space for sure, but in all the wrong places.
Call me crazy, but I think we all owe it to each other to, I don’t know, stay on Earth? Our house is quite literally on fire, the US is slouching towards fascism, and Waka Flocka Flame is headlining Floralia. We’ve got issues down here that need fixing, people! Besides, the only space tourism I promote is Little Einsteins.
If, after all this, I somehow convinced you to go to space, all you have to do is visit Blue Origin’s website. First, fill out your name, address, and a 500-word description about yourself. All that’s left is to wire over that 150K, hand over your soul, and you’re good to go. Safe travels!
